The theory of extraterrestrial cats

I know many of you will take me for crazy, or that I pretend to make a joke. But no, it’s not like that. I am a great observer of life, of reality, and under everyday reality there are mysteries, echoes, flashes of other more subtle realities, beyond the reach of the accommodated and superficial views.

I, thanks to my capacity for observation and analysis, have been developing this theory over the years and in the end the truth has been shown before my eyes at first skeptical. I still do not dare to describe this revelation as divine, but almost, almost.

Thanks to, although they are not convinced of my vision, I can argue various facts that support my theory of extraterrestrial cats, fruit of the study and the extensive coexistence with these beings.

The cat and civilization

How and when cats came to Earth is still an indecipherable mystery. But what we do know is the time and place where coexistence between man and cat began.

In the ancient Egypt of the pharaohs was the time and place where both species intertwined their destinies forever, or until the cats choose to end their invasion and decide what to do with us.

Because what I have very clear is that cats are alien alien beings. What happens is that they are very comfortable and do not like to rush. But the fact that it was Egypt, a desert place, the place chosen by the cats to contact with the human being, provides us with a first track as subtle as it is solid. Where would the cats find more sand than in the desert itself?

The cat, royalty and divinity

There are multiple examples in which cats they were considered members of the court, and even beings related to the gods. Egypt itself or Siam were reliable proofs of what I affirm.

However, the cats soon realized that this situation was potentially dangerous for them, if they were only related to the monarchies. The reason was that those old royals tended to tyrannize, subjugate and take advantage of their subjects. Contrary to what happens with the current monarchies, since all of them are sustainable, and do not hold privileges.

But that was another time and the cats, who did not have a hair of fools, realized that constant despotism would finally end badly for those who exercised it and their environment. Therefore, they decided to adapt and occupy all social scales to avoid future problems.

And there is another fundamental feature that points out and reveals the extraterrestrial origin of cats: they always shun and abominate the problems, unlike humans and other Earth fauna that are pleased to seek them.

In the following points we will show some glaring examples of my affirmation.

Cats do not get evicted

¿Someone has seen on occasion that they evict a cat from their home? I do not. Unfortunately I have observed on many occasions the sad images of evicted families from their homes. I even confess that I myself have suffered this brutal, degrading and scornful experience.

Occasionally I have seen images in which some of these unfortunate families were accompanied by a puppy, also evicted. But I have never observed a cat in this terrible position.

The reason, I have no doubt, is that the cats hide under the bed at the moment of the violent eviction by the police forces that force us to comply with the law. And this is because cats are aware that the bed is the only untouchable and unattachable element of a home. Also, why accompany the family in that hazardous and problematic situation, if at home you are so comfortable?

Cats do not touch in the massacres

The cinematographic art reflects with total realism the life as it is. And I am sure that you will also have noticed that in the movies and television series of police genre and crimes, a murdered cat never comes out. It is always the dog that dies first when trying to defend the family against the intrusion of a sinister serial killer at home.

However, if a cat comes out in the scene, the cat sneaks out of a window or hides under the bed. The cats detest the problems, for this reason they return when the police are in the homes of the massacres fulfilling their eerie duty. Which is not an obstacle to observe that at that moment the house is already safe for the feline. They also usually appear, never before, when the girl is saved after the criminal is killed in some way.

Are cats pet animals?

The question is: Are the cats with us or are we the ones accompanying them?

A dog if he sees us sad comes immediately to comfort us with licks, groans, and be sorry for our sadness. A cat will come if he wants, but rather to scratch the back or belly, or feel a bit cold and require our body heat to feel totally comfortable.

The common animals serve us in some way: they defend us or shepherd our flocks, they feed us with their meats, their milk, or their eggs; We even experiment with some as happens with rats. However, cats are above such easements. They go their own way.

For this reason they pretend to keep us company, especially the grandparents, whose legs spend hours before the TV, stealing heat and hoping to inherit some good pinch sooner rather than later.

Hygiene reveals its interstellar origins

The cats, yes, They are very clean. And this quality differentiates them clearly and historically from the different indigenous inhabitants of our planet. Including human beings.

A striking example is the palace of Versailles, a mammoth building that at the time of its construction lacked toilets. However, thousands of years before the cats made their depositions in the aseptic desert sand. Even today they continue to do the same on the sandy parcel of our common homes, in which we pay the mortgage, renew their sand, and feed and drink them. While they live and sleep what they want, for free.

The accomplices of the cats

A life as gift as that enjoyed by cats would be impossible without the acquiescence and financing of powerful economic entities that earn their living thanks to them. The most obvious example is that of the treacherous sofa manufacturers.

Why do not they use materials to build your furniture proof of the cat’s claws? Human technology has long discovered materials immune to scratches, such as chainmail, kevlar or carbon fiber. Why this insensate insistence on using spongy and soft materials to cover the structures of said furniture?

Is there perhaps an unwritten agreement between the manufacturers and the cats, so that the felines spoil and unravel the songs of the inferior structures of these furniture four days after the purchase of a new and expensive sofa?

I know that this and many more questions remain unanswered, and that there will be divided opinions about the cosmic origin, or not, of cats.

Much more research will be needed on this subject, and that people who suspect the same will provide us with information and mutual support.

The seven lives of the cat

This is a popular phrase, but I’ve seen it with my own eyes.

In the 2001 year I had a young Siamese cat, whose name was Mimi. One day he climbed onto the balcony of the clothesline and fell from four floors to an interior patio. We realized the moment of the event and I went down to look for the cat with the certainty of picking up the deceased. He was still alive, but very badly wounded. We immediately took her to the vet, who told us that she would most likely die because she had fractured her hip in various parts and very likely would have serious internal injuries. He did not prescribe anything or give him any painkiller.

Very saddened we picked up Mimi, convinced of her imminent end. However, before leaving the door the vet said: “With cats you never know, as they always fall on their feet. “

At home, I accommodated my siamese in a large basin full of sawdust and placed an infrared heater very close to her so that she would be as comfortable as possible in her condition. I spent three days and nights with Mimi, providing her with food and water. He hardly ate, and the poor animal remained in that container without moving at all. I changed all the sawdust every time I messed it up minimally. Three days later she left the basin on her own and walked laboriously to her container with cat litter.

Seven days later, he walked slowly around the room. Seven days later it was normal. Fifteen more days went by and Mimi ran and jumped as if nothing had ever happened to her.

Today, year 2016, Mimi lives with my daughter. Whenever I see her, she comes to rub against me affectionately. I mean the cat, not my daughter.

Is it possible that this kind of super-regenerative power occurs with any other being of earthly origin? I wonder.

A fear and a plea

That cats have colonized us is an irrefutable fact, although momentarily they are calm. However, something happens that fills me with fear: for a few decades, and after thousands of years of living together without problems, cats are currently sterilized by the decision of humans.

Will this cause that, in self-defense, the cats abruptly go from the silent colonizing phase to the final invasion? Will they sterilize us if this happens? It would not be surprising, because I do not imagine any being in the galaxy that is excited to practice this type of surgery with him and forgive the act.

Finally, a prayer. Please, readers who agree with my theory send me your comments, experiences and support.

On the other hand, you have to be fair, people who disagree with my theory of the cosmic cat give me reasons in the opposite direction and show me the weak points of my arguments. Show me that I am wrong and that cats, as my colleagues say, are affectionate and excellent pets, all without the intention of inheriting our goods and stealing our body heat.

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